Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Randomize
