I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
