Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
