If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
