Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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