Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
