Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize