I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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