I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
