left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
How external is "for external use only"?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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