I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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