So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
