just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
