no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
