and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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