Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize