no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
It's just like the Real World with babies
he was CRYING into my vagina
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
