They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
