She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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