Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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