we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
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