saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
