It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
