No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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