In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
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