Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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