she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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