And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
