haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I am mentally ready for anal.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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