Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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