he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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