she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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