I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Welp...herpes.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
