SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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