how hairy? two words: wookie tits
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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