i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
