Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
