I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
