Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
