this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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