belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Randomize
