I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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