New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He? As in you personified your dick?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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