Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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