GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
