They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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