We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
