I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
This house was built for laser tag.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
