Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
