i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
